Tuesday, September 25, 2012

A New Season

I did it. I did something brave.

I took a step back and I am trying on a new hat, so to speak.

And I didn't do it for myself or for Leo. This life changing decision was solely based on Jacob because he is without a doubt, my driving force these days.

I changed jobs.

I am no longer the Manager of Alumni Relations. As of last Monday, I am the new Biographical Data Specialist, which is really just a fancy title for someone who manages data. I know, it's a very different hat - if anyone can see and feel a difference, it's me but so far I'm managing the transition quite well.

I know some of you may be wondering why I'd make such a change, especially since I was in a job that I really thoroughly enjoyed. All I can say is, I'm following my heart.

When I returned from maternity leave in January, I was determined to make it work. I strategized and organized and I was very lucky to find an amazing day care provider less than five miles from campus and for the first few weeks and even into March, I really thought I'd figured it all out but little by little, things started to fall by the wayside.

It wasn't long after when the guilt began to creep in. I'd come home late and Jacob would be sound asleep. I'd see him for a couple hours in the morning before going into work but I was also gone a lot during the weekends and it never seemed like there were enough hours in the day.

These were all new feelings for me and I didn't predict them to happen to me because like I said, I was determined to make it work. I've always been a "go-getter," "go big or go home" kind of a girl but in the grand scheme of things, when I really thought about where I wanted to be first and foremost, it was at home with Jacob.

This new job is a blessing because it affords me just that. It gives me the opportunity to put in a good day's work in a department that is filled with people who know me well and who have supported me and encouraged me every step of the way.

It's funny - recently, I took a survey that would identify my top five strengths and initially, I was really surprised to find out that "Achiever" wasn't one of them. But after thinking about it, I realized that it makes perfect sense because climbing the ladder has never really been my goal - rather I've always been drawn to anything that involves me and others feeling connected.

Whether it's an event, a party, a fundraiser, a conversation and maybe yes - even a data project. Talking things out and learning from others - strategizing, creating and executing a plan of action and then seeing the final product. All of these things make me feel accomplished. fulfilled. successful.

I suppose If I'm being honest, I do think about the people I may be disappointing at times because I am one who genuinely cares about how I'm perceived. But I guess I my hope is that in this new role, I will be able to showcase some new talents. Many of which I may not even be aware of.

In the meantime, I am just feeling really blessed that I have this amazing opportuity - a new beginning and new season to really enjoy being a Mom. Thank you, God. I'd also like to thank all of you, my blogging community for sticking by me, even through my long absences. I have definitely missed you!

Enjoy the evening!
Missy