32 Weeks

Today marks 32 weeks - can you believe it?

This past Wednesday was another big day for Leo and I. We toured the maternity ward of the hospital where Jacob will be born. Altogether there were 18 expecting Mommies with their proud hubbies in attendance. To my delight, there were mini pink and baby blue cupcakes along with assorted cheese and crackers, lemonade and pitchers of iced water with lemon slices - Yum-Oh!!

Then the 12-minute video began by highlighting the history of the hospital, which by the way was built in the early 1900's - not sure I really needed to know that but then it went over the admission process and other important details. Then it was time to walk around the actual maternity ward - our tour guide was a woman by the name of Dee but she quickly announced to us that we could call her Dee-Dee. She was a sweet lady and it was very evident that she loved her job.

We toured the semi-private rooms, the private rooms and the labor rooms. Let's just say I'm hoping to be lucky enough to get a private room. And last on our scheduled tour was the area where the babies are checked and given a thorough examination - we even got to see an adorable 8-pound baby girl who had just been born earlier that afternoon. 

All in all, Leo and I learned a lot and it was nice to get a feel for the space that we would soon bring our baby boy into the world.

Enjoy the Weekend!
Missy

My Dad and Life Lessons

Most of you didn't know my Dad. He was smart, funny, generous and affectionate. He could also be complicated and difficult to read at times. He never had a hard time saying, "I love you." but like many of us, he struggled with admitting when he was wrong.

When I was a little girl, I remember him being the kind of person who would give you the shirt off of his back and he loved nothing more than to cook and share his dishes with others. We were a fairly large family (I'm one of 5 kids) so he always cooked enough for what seemed like an army, which meant that there were always left-overs for days. My friends loved to sleep over because that meant that more than likely they would be indulging in homemade banana pancakes the next morning.

He had a great smile and an infectious laugh. He enjoyed working with his hands and he loved listening to his eclectic collection of albums from Freddy Fender, Jerry Lee Lewis and Aaron Neville to Three Dog Night, Elvis Presley, Sam Cooke, Otis Redding and Kenny Rogers to name just a few. He looked forward to having family over for the holidays and he went out of his way to ensure that everyone was well-fed, content and happy. 

Sometimes I can't help but wonder what if things had been different? What if he were still here today? Would we have been able to mend our relationship? I'd like to think so. In life it's easy to feel regret but I also know in my heart of hearts that I did what I had to do...at the time for me. And regardless of what happened, I LOVE my Dad very much and I will always hold fast to the good times and the great memories we had while he was here.

My relationship with my Dad didn't end up where I would have liked it to be before he passed but sometimes we have to let go for our own sake. Most people may not understand this but as hard as it was to walk away, it was even harder on me to stay and when I did, he didn't show any interest in doing whatever it took to save our relationship. Maybe it was his pride or his ability to be stubborn at times or a combination of both, I will never know but I have to believe that he missed having me in his life and wished things were different.

Since then, I have forgiven him and myself. Nothing will ever change the fact that he was my Dad and I wouldn't change a thing because just like every other experience in life, it has molded me in to the person I am today.

My Dad was a complicated man but he was also funny, smart, loving and generous. These days, when a song comes on that reminds me of him, I smile and hope that he is proud of the person I have become. The lesson here is that love sometimes isn't enough to make a relationship work but you can still appreciate how it helps you navigate through the rest of your life.

Today, I can most definitely appreciate the traits that he has unknowingly passed down to me. I like to look at it as an unexpected blessing that I will always appreciate and hold on to. 

Life Lessons
You may have thought I didn't see,
Or that I hadn't heard,
Life lessons that you taught to me,
But I got every word. Perhaps you thought I missed it all,
And that we'd grow apart,
But Dad, I picked up everything,
It's written on my heart. Without you, Dad, I wouldn't be
The (woman)(man) I am today;
You built a strong foundation
No one can take away. I've grown up with your values,
And I'm very glad I did;
So here's to you, dear father,
From your forever grateful kid. By Joanna F.
Enjoy the Day!
Missy         

Busy Bees

Hello! It's me. Malissa...the author of this blog. I know - it's been awhile. Once again. Life has been a-buzz with work, activity, baby preparations and birthday celebrations, a much-needed vacation to Mexico and more work.

I do want to sincerely thank all of you for sticking with me, despite my ability to go missing in action for weeks at a time. I think about blogging all the time but then I remember what is on my plate for the day and it gets pushed to the very end of my list of things to do. I'm sure my reasons are not foreign to you. We are all busy bees trying to keep up with the momentum that life tends to create for us, despite our efforts to prevent it. 

Sometimes I wonder what all of you have been up to. What types of activities and responsibilities fill-up your days? I'd love to know. I've been far more inquisitive than normal lately - asking everyone I know - especially those who manage to work a full-time job and raise children how they juggle everything. It's all a big mystery to me at this point but I'm also excited - anxiously awaiting all of the changes that are about to take place in our seemingly quiet life.

Yesterday I signed us up for the hospital tour and we also start Lamaze classes next month. Watch out people, we're on our way to learning everything we possibly can about the birthing process. I was talking to a friend just last night and she suggested getting a midwife...anyone out there have any experience with this? She seemed pretty positive about it - having tried it for several of her deliveries.

There have been lots of kicking these days and I doubt I will ever tire of it. Sometimes when I'm watching television I'll catch myself focusing my attention on my ever-growing belly instead of the television - I just can't help it. It's just such an amazing feeling - to know that our little Jacob is in there...kicking away. And yes folks, it is official. We have selected a name: Jacob Mario Hernandez. I've always love the name Jacob and Mario was lovingly selected in memory of my little brother Mario who passed away years ago. (sigh)

I'm also happy to report that my energy level is still going strong and thankfully I don't have gestational diabetes. In fact, since early March I've only gained 12 pounds. Although, I haven't been weighed since our vacation to Mexico last week. Chances are, I gained a couple of pounds from the endless buffets and late night snacks but isn't that what vacations are for? (anyone? anyone?)

So things are definitely going great. Busy as usual but still - enjoying every single minute of this pregnancy. As always, thank you for listening (reading) and I hope you all have a great weekend!

Missy

P.S. Here are a few photos from our trip!

25 Weeks: No Excuses - Just Do It.

I'm 25 weeks pregnant and everything is still going really great. I'm sleeping and eating well. My energy level is good and I'm keeping myself pretty busy with work during the week and with projects around the house - mostly decluttering and getting rid of clothes and things we don't use. (Last week I took at least 5 bags of clothing to the thrift store plus a few boxes of "stuff" = good progress)

I've also been making it my mission to stay on a schedule so that we don't end up with way too much to get done in September because it will undoubtedly be my busiest month at work with Homecoming Weekend in early October. And I'm pretty determined to do it all - the hospital tour, lamaze classes, breastfeeding classes and CPR training because I want to make it a priority to do it all - no matter how busy things get.

But I have noticed a change in me - or rather something that is more prominent than normal.  I've just sort of been in this "no excuses, just do it" mentality and as a result, I've been struggling a lot lately with relating to and being there for others. I guess it's because my reaction is to get down to business, solve the problem and stay away from any impending drama. And often the hardest part for me is figuring out why others can't come to the same conclusion on their own.

I just truly believe that if you are not happy - if you are not living the life you want to live, then you are the only person who can change it. Not Mom and Dad, not your siblings, not even your closest friends. Trust me, I've tried and failed miserably at fixing other people's problems. As a friend, I have found that my only role should be to listen, make suggestions and then support the final decision - whatever that may be. And I can pray about it in hopes that everything works out for the best.

We all have at one point or another been in a bad situation but how we handle them - how we choose to prepare ourselves to manage while we are in the midst of it and how we plan to overcome and get past them is the most important part. Of course we can kick and scream, complain and point fingers in the opposite direction but at the end of the day, it's not going to do us a bit of good because we all have choices. Venting is necessary to process and figure things out but it should never stop there.

I wish life could be easier for all of us but it just isn't. There are challenges to face and obstacles to overcome. Issues to solve and problems to fix. I'm not even sure why this subject is so prominent on my mind - especially on a night like this - the 4th of July. The only thing that makes sense is that maybe my being able to get pregnant after so many years has made me more confident in my abilities to do what ever it takes - to never ever give up and to always live live to the fullest, even while you are working on your dreams.

I read a post tonight that asked the question, "When is it time to give up?" My answer is always going to be never. Because in my experience, even when you think you've given up, your heart will never fully allow it. Do whatever it takes today. Don't wait for tomorrow, next week or next month. And don't expect or wait for others to change your life - it's not their life to change. No more excuses: just do it - do whatever it takes to create the life YOU want. Why? Because you deserve it!

A Double Dose of Good News

I received a double dose of really good news today.

Leo and I had a doctor's appointment just a few hours ago to go over the results from my prenatal testing and everything came back normal. (Yay!) And now that I think about it, this doctor's visit was very different. Probably because I was different. I didn't spend my whole day worrying about it or pray fitfully in the lobby while waiting for my name to be called and I didn't kick my legs uncontrollably in the room while waiting for the doctor to come in.

It felt nice to (finally) feel in control, safe and secure. 

It was as if all of my fears had quietly fallen by the wayside without so much as a single peep. I wish you could have seen it - I was cool as a cucumber, which most of you know by now is not my normal standard operating procedure. I was happy. Funny, even. It feels great to finally enjoy being pregnant, to take it all in without holding my breath and relish in every single moment. Even moments like this one.   

The second order of good news I wanted to share with all of you is also BIG...monumental even. At least for one very special couple. Remember my friend who had just completed a round of IVF?

Well....she's PREGNANT!

That's right. I nearly screamed when I read her post. She received confirmation just a few days ago - please continue praying for her as she and her hubby navigate through the next few months. It's still a very scary experience - at least in the beginning. When I hear of another couple who have broken through the infertility barrier (literally), it strengthens my belief that dreams do come true and more than anything else, it keeps hope alive for the couples out there who are still working hard to break through.

Thank you, to each and every one of you who said a prayer for her. I really and truly appreciate it.

Last weekend the hubby and I hit another milestone in the pregnancy calendar - we registered at Babies R Us and at Target. I have dreamed about moments like this one for years. And I wasn't disappointed. It was also a great experience for my little sister and I to share. She's a Mom of three, one of them just turned 2 years old so she turned out to be the biggest help.

There is SO much we didn't know.

Like that there are several different types of bottle nipples including slow and regular flow. Um...nope. I didn't know that. And did you know that a box of diapers will run you around $40? Yep, didn't know that either. We obviously have a lot to learn over the next couple of months but we really enjoyed the process and the "schooling" we lovingly received from my little sister.

It's funny, when I think about it...you know...her being the little sister. I never would have imagined that she'd be the one teaching me all of this stuff but I'm so very thankful. She's quite the Mom to my nieces and nephews and I honestly wouldn't have it any other way.

P.S. We made a huge change recently in regards to the nursery. Instead of the firetruck theme, we are going with Vintage Mickey Mouse. I've always loved anything Disney and he liked the fact that it had a sports feel to it so Vintage Mickey it is! I'll try and post a photo soon!  

Enjoy the Day!
Missy

A Big Month

Sorry, friends. Once again it's been far too long since I last posted. Work is busier than ever with getting ready for Homecoming Weekend and making sure that my replacement is trained for when I go on maternity leave. 

Besides that, June has just been a very busy month with graduations, awards ceremonies, birthdays, doctors visits and big developments with regards to the nursery. Two weeks ago my Mom was in town so we went shopping for the furniture. We tried several stores before finding "the one", or in this case, "the set" at Babies R Us. In addition to the crib and attached changer, we also got the matching dresser. I usually gravitate towards lighter shades of wood but the color of this set just seemed so rich and timeless.   

The boxes of furniture are now sitting in the middle of the room waiting for Leo to work his magic. My plan is to have the room completely cleaned out and prepped this weekend so that painting can commence soon after. Next weekend we are planning on registering and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't looking forward to it. Oh my goodness, who am I kidding - I can hardly contain myself! As far as the theme for the nursery, initially I had wanted to do traditional Winnie the Pooh but now I have my eye on this set that I saw at Babies R Us - totally cute, don't you think? 

Leo and I went to my last ultrasound appointment at the Perinatal Center yesterday. The pictures were even clearer than the last and we even caught a glimpse of our little one kicking his leg up nearly up to his head. (he's been very active lately - I feel him kicking most of the day now) Luckily, the technician was able to capture this funny image for us to take home. The best part though was hearing him say that everything looked normal. (Yay!)

I also conquered a pretty big fear of mine by going to the dreaded dentist last Wednesday. (hopefully I'm not the only one who avoids the dentist like the plague) Not only did I go but I also got some much needed work done, including a thorough cleaning. Everyone in the office was so nice and willing to do whatever it took to put my fears at ease. When all the work was done, the dentist walked me out of the office, gave me a big hug and said I had done wonderfully...it was just so nice, I have to say. 

Lastly, I don't do this often but I have a prayer request for a fellow blogger (and friend) who recently completed a round of IVF and is waiting to find out the outcome. I can't imagine what she is going through right now. Please lift her up in prayer - just as you did for me. The issue of infertility still weighs heavily on my heart. It's tough because I meet women all the time who are doing their best to navigate, live with and overcome this growing issue. I'm praying hard that my friend quickly becomes one of them.  

As always, thank you for listening! (reading) I hope everyone is well and happy.

Enjoy the Day!
Missy

It's a Boy! (On the Way)

Note: this is not an actual ultrasound photo

Hello Everyone!

Just a quick post to share our BIG news - We have a baby BOY on the way! Earlier today we had a ultrasound done at the Perinatal Center and the pictures were pretty convincing. Lol!  To say that we are both over the moon with joy is definitely an understatement. It's been a very long road but in hind sight, I honestly couldn't feel more grateful for it all: the good, the bad and yes, (maybe) even the ugly.

I am proud to say that I am going to be a Mom at age 38. I never would have imagined having a baby at this stage in my life but then again, I'm a much better person today than I was even just 3 years ago. I've learned SO much and have been fortunate enough to experience more than my share of independence and indulgence. We're most definitely settled in our home of nearly 11 years and my job is stable - thank goodness!

In September, Leo will turn 40 and we will celebrate our 11th wedding anniversary in November. Then for the grand finale, we expect the arrival of our little boy to be on October 15th so it's definitely a year full of reasons to celebrate! Thank you once again for all of your love, support and prayers.

Your constant presence (you know who you are) has meant more than you will ever know.

Enjoy Your Day!
Missy