Thursday, January 5, 2012

Lesson #1: Never Say Never


This by far is one of the biggest lessons I have learned over the past few weeks. That and I can only be the best Mom I can be and comparisons will only drive you nuts. For years I claimed I would never let my baby sleep in our bed. Boy was I mistaken. This stead fast rule diminished within only a few days, mostly due to my lack of sleep. The fact is, he just sleeps better and longer with us. And also because who could resist snuggling up to him? I obviously can't.  

I have been feeling really guilty about it, thinking I was only doing it for selfish reasons but then I found this great article on the subject written by Dr. Sears. In it he explains his own personal experience with co-sleeping, which he calls sleep-sharing. It is a very interesting article and it really made me feel better about our inadvertent choice to co-sleep with Jacob. It really has been a great bonding experience for the three of us but I have decided to make it a goal of mine to break this habit before he turns 6 months old and not just for our benefit but for his benefit as well.     

I have however been really good about putting him down for naps during the day so he can sleep soundly for up to four hours in his play crib. And he's pretty good at entertaining himself when I need to take a shower or do a few things around the house. Recently, I've started reading to him and he loves it when I talk to him - I purposely ask him questions and include pauses for him to add to the conversation. And physically he is changing literally every day, which is so amazing to me. At his last doctor's appointment he weighed in at a healthy13 pounds and measured at 23 inches long. (he currently wears size 3 months)

I (finally) started taking video of him last week - in it I talk about his current likes and dislikes and more importantly, any milestones he has reached such as his very first laugh (this magical moment happened two weeks ago = best moment to date) Currently, he loves watching the ceiling fan spin and there is a little black and white safety symbol imprinted on his car seat that he always seems so interested in. He has also discovered his feet - he loves watching them move and he kicks like crazy when he gets excited. To capture the physical changes in him from month to month and since we received so many beautiful blankets, I started taking a photo of him laying on a different blanket once a month. I hope to keep this up through his first birthday.

The biggest change for us to date has been that I returned to work on January 3rd and Leo is now home with him for the next 7 weeks. It was hard but surprisingly not as hard as I thought it would be. The big "to do" on my list right now is to find the best darn place for him I can find. Day Care Centers so far are out of the question. The first place I called quoted me $299 per week, which I still cannot wrap my head around. $1200 a month - that's a house payment. Yikes!

So the search continues. I do have a couple of front runners right now for in-home day care, which makes me feel a little better but I want to make sure I exhaust every possible option before we make a final decision - I will be sure to keep you all posted. I guess that pretty much catches you up to what I have been up to for the last month and a half.

The lessons certainly keep coming and my tolerance with sleep deprivation has seemed to improve a bit but overall, I am feeling really good and I am definitely the happiest I have ever been. I also managed to lose 35 pounds with very little effort on my part since October - I owe it all to Jacob because he is such a active baby. When I mentioned this to a friend recently, she smiled and said..."Of course, he is just like his Mommy."


(Big Smile) 

Enjoy the Day!
Missy

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh girl. I can relate on SOOOO many levels. I could have been the poster girl for not letting kids in your bed. Abby is 9 and she was never in my bed. Honestly it wasn't until the past few years that she has slept with me a few times while Hubs was out of town on his fishing trips. I just never did. No real reason other than I thought that you shouldn't. I always looked at it as a sign of weakness, so judgemental of me.

I was on board to stick to the same thing when I was pregnant with K. Not necessary and not happening. Oh how that didn't happen. She slept in the bassinet next to my hospital bed and I loved seeing her. The idea was that she would sleep in the pack n play at the end of our bed so she was close. Yeah, let's just say that lasted 1 night and then she was in our bed every night. I loved it. I felt guilty but having her close, even sleeping on my chest at times was heaven. Hubs was loving it too. She slept so perfectly and although I don't think we did it was still so nice.

I even laid her in our bed for naps until she was about 2 months and then I started having her nap in her crib. Hubs got nervous about it as we got more comfortable with it, fearing we would roll on her or something. I agreed that when she was 3 months we would go to her sleeping in her crib. It was so hard to do but I did stick to it and I have to say it was a much smoother transition than I expected.

We started laying her down awake and she did very well with it. We let her cry for a bit the first few nights but she only cried 3-4 minutes and then would pass out. One night she cried for almost 10 and it killed me. But after about a week she wouldn't fuss at all. We have stuck to it and at 6 months we started a night time routine of bath, bottle & book. Hubs and I switch - 1 does bath, 1 does bottle/book and we alternate nights. It has made a big difference, I can tell that she knows what is going on and seems ready for bed when the time comes.

I adore the video idea, that is great and will be so special when he is older!!

I think the lessons learned are what make us great mothers. You have to try/fail/try to achieve great things and even though the fails sting a lot more when it's our kids, it's so worth it. Congrats on the 35 pounds, that is fantastic! Love you girl!

Missy said...

I'm glad I'm not the only one! Lol! I agree, at first it was just so that I could get some sleep - he sleeps so much better with us, of course! I'm sure it's the warmth and the fact that if he stirs, I can rub his back or sing him back to sleep. If only they invented something that could replace all of that, I'd be set. Lol! Love u too!